It's fast approching and  I squint my eyes, trying so hard to read the number. But wait, I'm not alone. Everyone else is on the lookout for their buses. It reminds me of how racing greyhounds anticipate the opening of their doors at the start of a race.

The bus stops and everyone starts rushing in. Just after the person in front of me gets a seat, I spot a vacant chair - and it's the last one.  I sit down on it. While the bus is stuck in traffic jams, I'll be sitting here comfortably for the next hour. I'm happy.

I take a short nap. I was up the whole night studying for a difficult exam today which lasted forever.

A few minutes pass. I open my eyes and notice an old lady just boarding the bus. I quickly stand up and offer her my seat in this jam-packed vehicle. She's thankful about the offer and walks towards me. However, as I stand up from my seat and look up, I realise that there has been another old woman standing beside me all this while.

The woman whom I just offered the seat to takes my seat. As I move further in, I look at the other woman and notice that she's giving me an annoyed look.

Did I just make her unhappy? I didn't really see her. And wait, I did something nice for someone, didn't I? The annoyed woman was in the bus first...and she looks older. Did she deserve it more? But...how do I know if she's older? So, if you're older, does it mean you deserve to seat more than anyone? More than me?

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The student should have probably taken the MRT.

But, what if the same thing happens except the one who gets the seat is a pregnant lady and the annoyed person is an old man?

Ok, before it gets more confusing, let's tackle the obvious issues here. Why should people give up their seats? And, how do we choose the 'deserving' person? How about the younger ones - does it mean we always have to keep standing up in public transport?

Why should I give up my seat?

I will try not to answer this in an all-knowing tone. But I think it's really a simple answer. Why should I give up my seat to someone who needs it more? If I had legs of an 80 year-old or a person who just got into an accident, would I really be comfortable standing up for a long time? If I was carrying a baby in my arms or a fetus in my womb, would I be happy that other people or bags are hitting the young I am carrying?

If I was carrying five plastic bags after wakling around the market for an hour and dreading to go to a house that has a kitchen yet to be cleaned and two children to be fed, a person who offers me a sit will make my day. Does it solve my problems? No. But, it surely makes me feel better. And sometimes, that 'better feeling' can help me get through the whole day.

We give up seats not because we will be saved from embarrassment or guilt, but because we can empathise with the person.

Who deserves to sit?

Ok, I'll admit it. The story I just told was mine. Yes, I admit I felt bad for the annoyed woman. I remember feeling drops of sweat on my forehead while she stared at me with her condemning eyes. But after the whole thing, I realised that I should be cutting myself some slack. My intentions were good, and that was all that mattered. It wasn't as if I personally hated the woman and decided she deserved less.

When I saw the other woman after my short nap, I didn't spend a few minutes deciding whether or not I should give the seat to her. I can't exactly explain why I had automatically stood up. Perhaps it's because I have spent enough time with my grandparents and other elderly people to know their weaknesses, helping me empathise better with the old. And, perhaps, it's also thanks to how I was brought up by my parents, who taught me the importance of helping people in need.

Or perhaps, it's simply because I've always believed in the golden rule, "Treat others how you want to be treated."

So, how do we know if the person deserves the seat? I guess a logical thing to do is to put yourself in the person's shoes and ask yourself a simple question, 'Do I really need a seat more than that person?'.

Getting The Short End of The Stick

So, are we youths at a disadvantage? We're the fitter ones and the ones with the most energy, right? That's true. But as much as we'd love to be real superheroes, we're not. We get tired too, so please don't blame us for wanting to sit.

If there is a passenger who is incapable of standing for very long and there was one seat left, I'd definitely let him or her have it, even though I was tired. I'd be lying though if I said that there was never a time I wished someone else would give up their seat especially when I'm tired. But oftentimes, sacrificing is better than depriving someone the comfort you know you can live without for that time being.

If you find yourself in such a sticky situation, it would still be nice to at least ask the passenger if he or she would like to seat, no? 

In A  Nutshell

At the end of it all, the only good reason why I think we should be more considerate of others whether it be giving up seats, cleaning up our mess after eating, or greeting people with smiles is because it makes our home a more liveable place for you and I. If you want a pleasant environment to live in, it really starts with you. 

Are you nodding your head right now? No? Probably shaking it from left to right? Or do you have something to bring up which I should have? Have a similar story to share? In any case, please drop me your comments. I would love to read them :) Or better yet, share a kindness story and submit it here. Don't worry, you have the option of remaining as an "anonymous" sender ;) 

Have a nice day!

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